Rookie Drain Unblocking

And we’re back! I’m Sue Ridge, and this is my co-host Shannon Gardiner. We’re excited to announce that we’re just moments away from the beginning of Melbourne’s Annual Drain Unblocking Competition! I’m almost shaking with anticipation, Shannon! How are you feeling?

Oh, Sue! I can hardly contain myself. I can’t wait to see which of these hunks is going to channel their inner-plumber – remember they aren’t allowed to actually be plumbers to enter the competition – and completely tear apart the competition! Like I said before the break, my money’s on Heath. I could watch him do drain repairs in the Brighton area, or any suburb for that matter, all day!

Great analysis, Shannon. It really is an exciting time. It’s time that we’re quiet now though, the twelve contestants are stepping up to their blocked drains. Just like every other year, they get ten minutes to assess the situation before they start doing any unclogging or unblocking. There’s always a couple of contestants who go early and get confused midway through because they didn’t give it enough forethought. I wonder who that’ll be this year. Let’s see.

Oh no! Not Heath! I can’t believe it. He looked at his blocked drain for about a second and now he’s reaching for a crowbar. Doesn’t he know that if you’re doing a drain replacement near Melbourne, a crowbar isn’t the best tool for the job?! I’m legally not allowed to say what the best tool is in case one of the contestants overhears me and gets a competitive advantage over the other contestants. But I can tell the audience watching that a crowbar is not the best place to start.

Shannon! You’re not even allowed to say that! We’re supposed to comment on what’s happening, not offer any of our own opinions. Just because it’s Heath that has jumped the gun early doesn’t give you any right to go off script. Now, let’s go back to the action… I see that Darren has started off well. Okay, we’ll be quiet now while the action happens.

Blocked drains: Cafe closed!

blocked drain repairJohnny’s cafe has really become part of my routine now. I pop in every morning for a coffee and occasionally a croissant. I’ve even started to leave home a little earlier so I have time to actually sit in there and enjoy it. So you can imagine my shock when I rocked up yesterday morning to find it closed! I didn’t know what to do, no sign of johnny and all the doors were locked. I got my coffee elsewhere and found a number for Johnny. I gave him a call and turns out he was having a problem with the plumbing and he thought he had a blocked drain. Melbourne has been experiencing some seriously heavy rains and he thinks something might have clogged the system because his taps weren’t working properly last night. I am glad I called or I would have spent all day worrying about him.

In all the years he has been open I have never known Johnny to take even an afternoon off work. He said he had arranged for the plumbers to come round today so all being well he should be back in business tomorrow but he’ll let me if it looks more serious. I hope he doesn’t need any drain repair in Melbourne, it can be very costly and although Johnny does do well at the cafe I know he doesn’t get a chance to save a lot. Johnny hasn’t called yet but I fear it is bad news. Those drains are worked pretty hard and it’s an old building that I doubt has had much maintenance over the years. I remember a few years ago some hoodlums smashed the front windows of the cafe and the community go together to raise the money needed to fix it. If the drains turn out to need extensive repairs I will organise a community fund.